Parental Gatekeeping: The Hidden Barrier in Engineering Education
In my experience, parental gatekeeping is the most overlooked and detrimental aspect of pre-collegiate engineering education. 📸 Allen Kpentey
Twelve years ago I was a tech-savvy 7th grader living in a society on the cusp of normalizing touchscreen smartphones. My LG flip phone contract was up for renewal and thanks to my novice research on consumer electronics, I knew I needed the HTC Evo 3D smartphone. But Mama did not approve of purchasing these expensive futuristic gadgets, even for herself—dismissing them as pointless and unnecessary. So I made her an offer she couldn’t refuse: with all my saved up gift money, I pay the upfront cost of both our phones while she pays the monthly fees.
To my delight, she agreed! That smartphone exposed me to a world of information and customization, all through a well-engineered handheld device. Naturally, I wanted to know more. Little did Mama know, my exposure to her approved purchase would encourage me to become the electrical engineer I am today.
My first ever smartphone, the HTC Evo 3D.
Somewhere in the world there is a similarly capable child who can embark on the path of becoming an awesome engineer, but there is something extraordinary in their way. For this child, the barrier isn’t necessarily a lack of resources. Nor is it imposter syndrome. Like the final level of a video game, in order to truly reach the child, one must overcome the ultimate boss: the child’s parent and/or caretaker.
Supported by several academic theories, recent research has found “parental influence may present opportunities or obstacles during career exploration” for children in their formative years. A 2019 Zimbabwean study describes parental influence as “proactive” and recommends parents be exposed to and equipped with relevant career information to assist in career guidance.
In my experience, parental gatekeeping (as I like to call it) is the most overlooked and detrimental aspect of pre-collegiate engineering education. I see it most often in homes where even the idea of college--not to mention the field of engineering--is as foreign as Mars. Or in American homes where English is the second or third language. I’m talking about the caretakers who will never read this article because it simply isn’t in their wheelhouse or on their radar. Nonetheless, studies show regardless of educational skills, the family at large has strong intentional and unintentional influence on children’s career paths.
For five years I organized and volunteered for the National Society of Black Engineers (NSBE) at Cal Poly, where we attempted to establish a pre-collegiate NSBE chapter in our county. In my last year, we planned to give the kids a leg up by offering cash scholarships for A’s and B’s on their report cards--in any subject--but not a single person claimed the cash.
One revelation from this failure was that serving resources to children, especially elementary and middle schoolers, requires the caretakers’ blessing. The caretakers need to be sold on the value in it first, in order to get the kids on board. Yet, how is one supposed to appeal to parents and caretakers who are not familiar with engineering in the first place? After all, as Nas once rapped, people “fear what they don't understand, hate what they can't conquer.” Thus, hesitations and skepticism like Mama’s are justified.
Counseling research in countries like America and Zimbabwe recommend parent-child mediation through professional school counselors. These school counselors should serve as a helping hand to caretakers in helping to dissolve stereotypes, gain technical awareness, and understand parental influence.
As the first engineer in my extended family, I attempted to be the “counselor” to convince loved ones to enroll their kids in STEM programs or allow their kids access to next-gen consumer technologies. Some thought their kids were “too young” while others did not have the financial or logistical means to participate. I also sensed a bit of procrastination. As career counselor, Mary Jacobsen, wisely asserts in her book Hand-Me-Down Dreams, “adults often underestimate children’s intuitive abilities and overestimate their own self-knowledge and self-control.”
I also should note the digital divide prevalent these days. For instance, as of 2020, over half of Earth’s 7.9 billion people still do not use any social media—an indication of the digital revolution’s unfinished permeation. Thus, I agree with researchers who recommend parents need to be provided training whether through pamphlets or workshops.
Meanwhile, the U.S. K-12 public school curriculum seems to be the venue best fit to directly reach all students and ensure “no child is left behind.” But if it really were, then we wouldn't have the need for education-supporting nonprofit organizations and supplemental after-school programs. I can attest to this because, although I attended respected public schools for K-12, my peers and I were also enrolled in an effective-yet-expensive after school math program called Kumon from 4th to 8th grade.
So while adults toil to reform the public school system and its curriculum, the for-profit and nonprofit industrial complexes compete to build the spaces we wish to see and attract the families they wish to serve. You can thank capitalism for this facade.
At the end of the day, change must occur in a very personal and private space: the home. “Career guidance begins in the home and ends in the home,” states Dr. Yogesh Singh in his book Guidance and Career Counseling. The opportunity for life-changing pre-collegiate engineering education may only appear in a singular moment or decision. Don’t miss it!
Here I am in 8th grade with my science fair project, a laser diode circuit board. The was my first true exposure to the world of electrical engineering. Fast forward 10 years and I now have two electrical engineering degrees.
All that said, I currently don’t have any children of my own. But I am amongst the eldest of my fellow Gen Z-ers, having recently teetered from adolescence to adulthood. So I recognize the ambiguities of parental influence or gatekeeping. The “Mama knows best” mentality can only last for so long. Gradually and inevitably, the child knows even better.
